I don't want to go

This tale involves one my favourite chems, 2C-E, a couple of beers and the acclaimed psychedelic film "Yellow Submarine" by The Beatles.

Released in 1968, Yellow Submarine is one of the most acclaimed works of animation from the psychedelic era. It is almost legendary in the use of music, story and colour; and it is still one of my favourite animated films of all time.

2C-E –strange and wonderful stuff

First act: 2C-E

 

I had already loaded a cap with 15mg of pure snow white 2C-E and ingested it in the late morning, as I had finished the chores in the house the next six hours could be spent in "lalaland": no meetings, no articles to write, no deadlines, nobody to mind. Bliss. Joy.

The first couple of hours were fun "come-up pleasure". Visuals, amazing music enjoyment. Very pleasurable trip with no noticeable ill-effects. Surfed the net. Watched a black and white film. Lounged around.

I'm getting thirsty and it's time to get something to drink.

Second act: two beers and Yellow Submarine

 

As it was a hot summer afternoon, at T+3:00 I drank the two beers in a relatively short time, and then started watching Yellow Submarine –a thoroughly fascinating film whilst in a "different existential mindset".

The colours and the animation –even with the stereotypical psychedelic constructs of the 1960's– are absolutely brilliant and the music of The Beatles in the film is intense and very emotional.

"The Blue Meanies" – the villains of Yellow Submarine

Things were going well and I was glued to the screen with a perma-grin for almost the whole movie – until close to the end when one of my favourite numbers comes up: the end of the "Blue Meanies" when The Beatles perform "All You Need is Love"

Mesmerised and with the fully-dilated eyes glued on the screen, I went into a trance –I was very, very close to nirvana– and thought to myself in a comforting and almost loving way... "this must be a beautiful way to go once your number is up"

Bad move

 

Suddenly an intense panic attack came over me.

For a split second I felt I was drowning. I was agonising. I could feel my heart racing almost out of control –the ugly feeling of asphixia and panic you get when desperately trying to reach for air in a nightmare.

My experienced and fried brain went into "support mode" and I almost robotically switched the TV off, closed my eyes and –whilst still looking at all the closed-eyed visual fractals and spinning artifacts– started breathing deeply and evenly to calm down.

I thought about the cause of the unexpected bad funk. Because once you get it out of your system, it's gone forever and the trip can be turned around.

In my altered mind, the thought of "this must be a beautiful way to die" was transposed to "you are dying now" –and my primal survival instincts had kicked in, no doubt influenced by the copious 2C-E and boosted by the two king-sized bottles of beer.

I decided to kill off the trip with a couple of Valiums and a cold shower. Some coffee and rest, whilst listening to light classical music. That did it and by nighttime I was feeling exhausted but in a serviceable condition.


The moral of the story: even in a perfect set and setting you have to be careful. Even happy thoughts can hurt.

How to stop a bad trip - or at least die trying

A bad trip, according to the definition in Wikipedia is a "disturbing experience associated with the use of a hallucinogen". The classical definition relates to a state of psychosis that may result in anguish, actual physical harm to self and to others, or risky behaviour as a result of a negative environment
(Timothy Leary's set and setting theory)

Sometimes you just have to hit the emergency button

These definitions stop short of exposing basic truths about a bad trip that a Psychedelic Dad has lived through. In my experiences:

• Every single mind-altering substance causes bad trips if mishandled. You name it. Even alcohol causes delirium tremens if abused for a long-enough period. One of my worst nightmares was a bad trip on methylone - a weaker relative of MDMA - in a domestic setting. Do not be fooled here.
• Bad trips can be "turned around". It takes a lot of experience, strength and willpower to do this, but it can be done -but sometimes bad trips can't be turned around. 
• Bad trips cannot be avoided. No, they cannot if the circumstances are negative, if you are worried, or in a harsh environment or have become entangled in a random negative event whilst high. "How do you think you will react if high in a house-party, and then suddenly the police come crashing though the door?"
• As a trip-sitter you must know how to react is someone else is having a hard time. This is why someone else is trusting you to look after them. Because you know your shit and they can't look after themselves. Sometimes, talking nice things and wrapping someone in a blanket does not work with psychotic people. 
• You are tripping solo, and things are not looking good. This is a hard one; not only you have no sitter to help you, but you must use whatever common sense is left in you to call a stop to the madness. If I feel that I'm coming up too fast, too soon, it's an indicator that something nasty is on the way and if I am not prepared to handle it, I do a run for the emergency button.

I always have Diazepam (generic Valium) around and I will stress the point of the post: you should have an emergency plan for responding to a bad trip situation -any other benzodiazepine or antipsychotic drug will do for stopping a bad trip, but if you don't have them before the trip starts your only other alternative is to contact the emergency services or ambulance in your locality. Or ride the bad trip out. With all the consequences these options may bring.

A bad trip can be stopped, you just need to know how.

If the patient is already manic and violent: unless you are lucky enough to have an anti-psychotic needle or you are able to calm the patient down to administer the Diazepam, the only viable option is to call for an ambulance.

If the patient is unresponsive or unconscious: place the patient on his / her side and ensure the airways are not obstructed and breathing can be maintained. Call for an ambulance *immediately*.

When ready to push the "stop button" take 20 milligrams of Diazepam with water - the hard part might be convincing the patient to do it as they might already be in a psychotic state. The pills can be crushed and mixed with water, or chewed before swallowing (they taste bad, but crushing them brings on the effects sooner...)

Tell the patient the truth and ask them to stay strong for 10 or 15 minutes - the Diazepam will start working very soon (you did crush the pills, right?) - in the meantime provide supportive care, blankets, fluids and a warm and caring environment. Turn off the lights and get rid of all noxious influences - this might be a good time for listening to Bach, and not Rage Against the Machine.

Do not go "how do you feel?" or "I told you it was too much" or "You scared me shit-less" every one minute or so: they will be feeling like survivors of a plane crash for the next couple of hours, so do not be an arse. There will be time for explanations later on.

After a couple of hours, serve something warm and nutritious to the victim - a chicken soup, a minestrone or something similar. Give plenty of fluids. Ask the patient to sleep until the next day, if possible.

That's all there is to it (in my experience); that's how you kill off a bad trip. Of course, others will have different experiences or may disagree with me, but that's what the Internet is for.